So I have been involved in the on-going process of purchasing a computer from a private party. I am now discovering that this was probably a terrible decision. The party involved seems to be scamming me, and I am left with the regrettable decision to report it as fraud. At the point of my writing this, I am out about $1250.00.

But I have learned from this whole experience.

I’ve learned that as I’m making decisions, I need to listen better to the discerning voice of the Holy Spirit. I have been learning this lesson the hard way a lot lately. Usually I’ll sense something about a situation or a decision and something equivalent to a warning light will flash in my mind. It’s something more than a mere sense of fear about a situation; it’s almost like I hear a voice saying, “Don’t do that, Stewart. It’s not going to end well.” Looking back on my most recent situation, I should have known better. I had a few instances where I felt like the Lord might be telling me something, but I chalked it up to my own fearfulness to take a risk. Now I wish I had listened.

In our worship of Jesus, we are to have more than an experiential, sing-song, kind of worship. We are in a relationship wherein we submit ourselves to the loving will which the Father has for His children. When we go against this submission, we are going against the worship of the Father. Ultimately, I know that this is what I have done. Now I’m left praying for deliverance and redemption, like a child who has decided to touch the stove after being warned that it is hot.

Lord, I repent of my self-reliance.